Art Fight Unofficial

LIGHTEN UP

DARVO (an acronym for "deny, attack, and reverse victim & offender") is a reaction that perpetrators of wrongdoing, such as sexual offenders, may display in response to being held accountable for their behavior.^[1]

Denial: The perpetrator denies the harm. By downplaying the effect of their actions, they dismiss the concern as an overreaction.

Attack: The perpetrator attacks the person calling out their behavior by shifting the focus to them, questioning their credibility or intentions.

Reverse Victim and Offender: Finally, the perpetrator reverses the roles by positioning themselves as the real victim, making it seem like they are the one being wronged.

ANONYMOUS ASKED:
Hi, just a concern with the theme poll, seems a little... meh to have lovestruck vs heartbreak (a very amatonormative theme) as a potential theme, especially when the theme poll released during arospec awareness week

ARTFIGHT
We understand the concerns this theme may have caused and it was not our intention to exclude anybody from participating in Art Fight.

Themes are meant to be open-ended, so they can mean something completely different depending on the person. While Lovestruck vs Heartbreak could be viewed romantically, it could also be viewed platonically (falling “in love” with a new series, heartbreak during a friendship, etc.).

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i appreciate the acknowledgment. personally as an aro person who is also weirded out by the theme, i think some of that weirdness comes from how the theme is broadly treated/interpreted. society generally tends to put romantic love on a pedestal (this is called amatonormativity) and so the general way these terms get treated is in the romantic sense. while individuals participating can interpret it however they want, my concern is that a lot of people are only going to be interested in the romantic interpretation, which i have no control over. i mentioned this on the site as well, but it's not an inherently bad theme and nobody has to feel bad for liking it. however, i am asking people to take what aro people are saying about it into consideration, especially since anyone who talks about it gets shut down or talked down to in conversation. some of you (broadly speaking) treat aro people like garbage and should work on that.

For me it was weird as a theme but mostly because there's... nothing that would be interesting about it visually. Artfight themes are best imo when they have a visual motif associated that's sufficiently versatile. Hearts? Putting hearts places? I think I put it bottom rank. Don't think it's gonna win

very great points!

i mean. lovecore is like. a thing though

Yeah, I know lovecore is a thing it's just super super specific. Maybe I'm just picky I know the theme doesnt have to be like something you involve in the art. It just feels like it's usually something more versatile

As an asexual who's been pondering whether they fall under the aro umbrella, I thought the Lovestruck vs Heartbreak theme was cute? I liked the theme!

It obviously wasn't meant to target anyone, it's just a general aesthetic theme. I didn't even know it was arospec awareness week, if I'm honest... Aren't we (people who fall somewhere under the aro/aroace umbrella) constantly reinforcing that romantic love isn't the only form of love out there? I think it opens up the opportunity to interpret it by how you personally define love. I think being upset about it actually feels... counterintuitive to me, but that's a personal opinion. Everyone has a right to be upset, but for a theme that is so low on the tumblr poll, I don't think there's a real reason to worry too much about it winning.

the number of people who think they're pulling a "gotcha" by accusing aspec people pointing out amatonormativity of somehow contributing to amatonormativity themselves just for pointing it out is...concerning. that's like if i were to point out the sexism behind the idea of "soft sciences" vs. "hard sciences" because the former is associated with fields that have higher numbers of women in them only for some dipshit to pipe up and go "so you hate women?" i'm sure this isn't a hypothetical and some people actually do this. in either case, it's completely ridiculous.

if nobody else is going to point it out, the community's tolerance of aro people is so paper-thin that the sheer number of people coming out to say 'it's not that deep' is boosting this specific post. so I'll like to remind everyone that the mod team probably permitted heartbreak vs lovestruck solely because the number of complaints about aspec users' discomfort will outweigh the more thorny issues of the leadership and budget.

It's mostly aroace or aspec people themselves saying it's not that deep though.

did you miss the 50% of my post that was pointing out that it's a distraction tactic?

Dude it isn't a conspiracy theory. Aspec people brought up the problem and are the ones commenting on it, further boosting the comment. I doubt the staff are rubbing their hands and set this up as a big ploy to distract people for like a week.

and you just fell for it again lmfao

As an aroace guy this doesn't feel problematic at all?. I'd join team lovestruck in a heartbeat. Hell yeah. Cutesy pink lovecore stuff is my jam

Lovestruck and heartbreak isn't even necessarily romantic. Just because people associate the word "love" with romance doesn't mean that all forms of love are solely romantic.
Sure, lovestruck has more romance in the word, I guess, I'll give you that, but heartbreak is an emotion everyone can feel regardless of romantic orientation. The fact "lovestruck" and "heartbreak" feels like it's excluding people who feel no romantic attraction feels weird to me.

But that's just my two cents

as an arospec person I'm going to be annoying and say it's amatonormative to assume that any theme about love is inherently romantic

in all seriousness the idea that themes on art fight exclude people is strange considering that the themes are abstract themes and never really meant to represent a person's real life experiences. as well as the theme of teams aren't something that's enforced. it'd be one thing if af enforced following these themes and punished you for not including it but it's another for it to be an optional thing to follow

I'm gonna be honest I know arophobia is something that does happen but this in all honesty really doesn't feel like it and as an arospec who's seen actual heinous shit said about arospecs this really isn't that deep. I've experienced WAY more heartbreak from experiences that aren't romantic. this is not an exclusionary concept and I have no idea why people are saying it is in the reblogs.

Love is a theme everywhere and will be forever and ever and ever it being a very common theme on a big community event isn't arophobic you nutjobs. You guys want to ban valentines next? Want to ban heart shaped items from stores? No more romance genres in books? Jesus christ get over yourselves love and heartbreak are going to be forever themes no matter what

Also platonic and familiar love are still a thing we feel and I love my fucking friends. "This is a distraction to single our aro people and deflect staff issues!" Be so fucking for real we have bigger things to worry about than whether adding a love theme to a silly art game is arophobic to us

Right! Breaking with amatonormativity is also realizing that these words can relate to more than romantic relationships only. :)

#can i say that i think some of you guys are chronically online #miscpost #i'm personally a big fan of this theme option so maybe im biased #- a sex and romance repulsed aroace

#as an aroace person i dont think this is an issue. at all. #1. not all romace related things are amatonormative #2. its words. for a silly theme. for a game about drawing art for people. i truly do not think its that serious #editing because others in the notes are right. 1. this reads as pretty chronically online #2. kinda amatonormative of the anon to assume heartbreak and lovetsruck was inherently romantic

#some of y'all are chronically online. touch grass #saying this as an aroallo guy. touch grass actually touch grass #this theme is not a problem. good god #bun reblogs #delete later

#reblog #miscpost #can i say that i think some of you guys are chronically online #i'm personally a big fan of this theme option so maybe im biased #- a sex and romance repulsed aroace #<- haven't seen poll but as a fellow sex repulsed and not giving a fuck about romance aroace i agree

This is literally a non-issue. Or did I miss the part where love is only and forever romantic? Do I need to break out the fact that other languages have more than one way to say “love” because it’s so multifaceted of a concept?

I’m only saying something directly because I think this is an absolutely fucking ridiculous stance to take. Saying stuff like this (what anon said) is not only completely ignoring that words for feelings (in English) have always had multiple meanings despite only having one most common word to convey the emotion, it’s also coming incredibly close to attacking people over nothing.

I’m aromantic and I think Lovestruck and Heartbreak are perfectly fine as concepts and they aren’t specifically excluding aromantics.

If you put LSvHB high/first on your vote list, don’t feel bad about it. There is literally nothing wrong with this. They’re just words to describe extreme emotions on two ends of a spectrum. You didn’t do anything wrong. I promise.

#art fight #artfight

#holy fuck thats actually so chronically online #saying this as an aroace person #theres literally such zero problem with a theme #its insane😭 #bitches be like “awarness for aro/ace people!” #and then process to push the agenda of some words being particully only romantic #like be fr rn

#lmao i have so many thoughts and not many of them are kind #speaking as an ace person #what's the big fucking deal LMAO #they're just words like #the art you make for artfight doesn't even need to follow this theme #and even if it did there is literally no one telling you that it even has to remotely be romantic #and honestly when i think of my own heartbreak in life #the most painful ones ive suffered have been from platonic relationships that ended too soon #like yeah it bugs me sometimes that romance is always the go to but also??? #you have the power to NOT make it the go to #lmao idk why this annoyed me so much #i don't speak for all of you so don't speak for all of us

dude this is so dumb. I’m aroace and I don’t have a problem with this. Yeah I don’t want romance but I can still respect and accept it. I personally think that it’s referring to when you ask someone out it can lead to love struck or heart break. You could even compare it to people either being a lovestrucker or a heartbreaker. It doesn’t even need to be romantic it could be about accepting or rejecting a potential friend. Their are so many different interpretations and meanings someone can have with it and even if people don’t like it than that’s okay it’s still their opinion

actually you know what i think some of you in the comments/tags need the chart.

ID: A flowchart titled "An aromantic person posted an opinion about [romantic] love online and I want to respond!" The first question asks "are you aromantic?" If yes, there is only one question about whether you intend to dismiss the other person because their experience or opinion doesn't match yours. If no, there is a series of questions including whether you understand the concept of amatonormativity, if you are about to lecture the other person on types of love or accuse them of overreacting, whether you understand why the person is saying the things they do, and whether you intend to engage with the other person in good faith. Depending on how you answer these questions, you are advised to either "go ahead!" or "shut the fuck up," with many prompts leading to the latter including a reminder to not be an asshole. End ID.

i think it's very telling how much backlash someone can get just for saying they're personally uncomfortable with a theme, especially since most of the other theme options have dedicated haters being much more dramatic about it. funny how it's pretty much just aromantic people who feel alienated by the subject getting backlash for it :]

obviously not all aro people have the same views on the theme - that's okay! if you're aro and like the theme, that's great! but maybe don't tell people who are rightfully uncomfortable with it to touch grass or otherwise accuse them of overreacting. you're telling on yourself.

also pointing out amatonormativity is not itself playing into amatonormativity. it's perfectly normal to point out just how many people saw this theme and immediately jumped to romantic love.

also, the reason some of us feel defensive about it is because it started out with us just stating an opinion and then getting horribly mistreated for it. surprise, people lash out when they feel cornered. maybe think a little more about the way you treat (other) aspec people before pulling a surprised pikachu face because someone said something you didn't like.

i am not going to argue with people about this. if you say dumb shit, i will block you. aro people get treated like this every year around valentine's day like clockwork. the "discourse" surrounding this theme is just one of the many, many examples of subtle and overt aphobia levied against aspec people who happen to have opinions on amatonormativity.

tl;dr: the theme is not inherently bad, but the reaction to legitimate concerns about it has been absolutely rancid. do better.

#this feels like if one of the theme options was Red vs Blue and someone said they didnt like the theme bc their favorite color was yellow #as said previously love isnt just a romantic thing #it can be platonic or familial or whatever you please #and it can just be. love. feeling care for someone/thing without a descriptor #im aroace-spec and i didnt find anything wrong with it #really the only thing i didnt like about it was that it was a bit simple as compared to city/forest or creation/destruction #and as said previously; you can apply “lovestruck” and “heartbreak” in a non-romantic situation #lovestruck when you see a kitten or puppy #heartbreak when someone close to you drifts away over the years #etc etc #and like some other rebloggers; saying that the theme is amatonormative is amatornormative in and of itself #because (imo) it shows that you havent separated romantic association from love in general #so #but i digress

arospec person here Can yall go outside

#NOBODY CAAAAAARES

#described #artfight #aromantic #real and true

#aphobia #cw aphobia #Rebloging for this handy dandy lil flow chart #But also I feel like responding to an aspec person expressing discomfort over something being romantic by going “Oh it doesn't have to be #romantic! It can be platonic“ is kind of not it. Other people have expressed this feeling far better than I can but it feels very dismissive #And also wtf is with all of these other aphobic comments and such?? And from fellow aspecs??? Wtf?? #Why are is everyone being so cruel?? #I'm cupioromantic and love love and think the theme is pretty cute but I also completely understand where this person is coming from! #It honestly makes me want to cry seeing so many other aspecs behave this way #I expect this from allos. Not other aspecs #Do better

#aroace here! love and heartbreak arent inherently amatonormative. that sounds like a You problem for assuming as such anon. #the theme is fine. not my first pick but its literally not a problem at all #other aspecs who are uncomfortable: that's valid! but saying 'do better' is terribly manipulative and guilt trippy #strangers online have no obligation to tiptoe around something you see as an issue that is a non-issue #'do better' the issue is you need to go outside. go outside and interact with real queer people if you can maybe.

#im aroace and I think it was my second vote lol

#harper reblogs

#reblog #yeah reblogging this #this also doesnt just apply to aspec people but any group you’re not a part of #txt #artfight #also absolutely No Hate but it’s interesting to see the inclusion vs. assimilation debate happening in real time in these comments #// aphobia #// long post #// ask for tags

Honestly yeah, the amount of fellow a-specs I've seen being absolutely, needlessly unkind and self-centered about this is so discouraging. And once again, I feel it's the apl aros and loveless aros getting thrown the most under the bus - it literally doesn't matter if the themes 'could' be non-romantic, it by definition poses heartbreak and misery as the opposite to being loving/full of love. That's extremely amatonormative and the peak negative stereotype about loveless aros (and non-aros who are loveless too).

If you're reaction to someone saying a theme or something makes them feel alienated is to immediately go 'wow that's so dumb and you're so childish and have no reason to be talking right now', you're just being an awful person, being aro-spec yourself does not give you more authority to act like that.

#art fight #aromanticism #aromantic #normally I don't post much but this was so baffling and frustrating to me #and no one else was mentioning the obvious #so I had to

#i personally dont mind the theme but i get where anon is coming from #but more importantly. #can yall stop being assholes in the tags?? #“go touch grass” “no one cares” #like when did it get so normalized to be so fucking mean #anon is being polite and just expressing their views like a normal person and some people are acting like theyre being totally insane #like it is not chronically online to be sick of seeing romance literally everywhere #and whether you like it or not the terms lovestruck and heartbreak DO usually mean romantic to most people #like yeah they shouldnt! but the reality is most people still connect them to romance #and i understand anon's exhaustion with seeing romance everywhere. i get it #honestly the ppl in tags saying touch grass and that thihaans is chronically online YOU are the chronically online ones #because if you actually got off the internet maybe you would realzie being a jerk to people for POLITELY expressing their view ISNT OKAY #anyways. sorry for the rant i am sick of how normalized it is becoming to be straight up rude #honestly #edited to add i think the original artfight response to this is fine! its the other blogs in the notes that are bothering me

#as an arospec it is not that fucking deep

#arospec here! personally i love the theme it was my first choice #like #i just like the aesthetics of hearts and broken ones #lol

#yeah the concept of love is open-ended by itself too. its not defined solely by romance #i think its fine to not like the theme if ur aroace but at the end of the day this is about giving art to others.. #idk as a veteran user ive been thru a lot of teams that come and go and they had virtually no impact on my experience #the team themes are as important as you make it

im crying im aroace and HOW is a silly theme an issue 😭 it can not be that deep

#what is happening here omg #i dont like the theme bc they feel too similar #whats this ask #artfight

#imgonna lose it why is this theme so controversial #clearly hearts and love only exist in a romantic context(me when i lie) #this is so stup[oid

Not trying to start shit but this is such a nothing burger of a complaint
Coming from an Aroace person myself it makes no sense to complain about a theme???

#reblogs #like #is it just me #sorry if this causes something #but like jesus christ

#Was not expecting casual aphobia/arophobia from a bunch of Art Fight users #That's very concerning #And the official response is not helping on that matter #To give a benefit of a doubt I think the introduction of themes on aro week was unfortunate timing #And so many people are like 'So? Why does this matter? It's just the theme.' #My dudes if the theme didn't matter there wouldn't be an annual poll for it. It is only the backbone of this art trading game. #I honestly think the theme is a bit too limiting anyways. Not open-ended enough. Like what can you even do with this? #I saw an alternative of 'fluff vs. angst' and I think that is way better. Gets the general idea across without the amatonormativity #Or 'comedy vs. drama' which was on last year's poll but not this year's for some reason? #Can we please not throw ace/aro/aplatonic people under the bus? Again? Or be rude to people who feel excluded by this theme? #I dunno as someone who is aro/ace I'm not sure which team I would even pick if this was the theme because both options are alienating #And I'm saying that as someone who is shipping trash and has a character/government assigned fursona who is also shipping trash #I guess my option would be the random button. But where's the fun in that? Is that really getting into the Art Fight spirit? #I know not all themes are gonna be appealing to everyone but I feel like not alienating people should be a baseline #The theme is fine. Liking it is fine. Voting for it is fine. But acting like people who are alienated by it are overreacting is not okay. #It is rude at best and casual aphobia/arophobia at worst. Yes even if you are aro and/or ace yourself. Stop throwing us under the bus.

#as an aroace im neutral about this theme #otherwise not very inreresting imo + excludes loveless aros and aces ig(?) #on a slightly unrelated note if this was the theme i would be very unserious about it #i’d join heartbreak and design my page with the most corny post-breakup 14 y/old instagram-esque bio #“streaks dhmu 💔⛓️🥀”

#people are running out of things to complain on #as an aroace i agree this is kinda dumb

#ooo yes i love this concept...

#i voted in the theme poll the same day it was revealed #i put lovestruck vs heartbreak as my first pick because i was interested by the aesthetic #i remember after i voted i read the comments and i fully recognized why the theme could be considered exclusive #a concern i've often seen for this theme is how characters may be represented #like lovestruck with characters being in love (platonically or romantically) with something/someone #while characters on heartbreak are portrayed as lonely or upset or angry #i was really hoping that would not be the case. seeing this explanation... well. it was heartbreaking! #because this isn't how i viewed lovestruck vs heartbreak at all! #i thought that parts of the words themselves would be taken literally #like loveSTRUCK with a lightning motif or heartBREAK with a glass/hammer motif #with lots of pink and purple hues #if this explanation for the theme is what we will be given for the theme if it were to win the poll #then i am not too thrilled about it. i don't think many people would be :/ #but considering the stir-up i think this theme will have to be removed anyway #and ehhh yeah that's okay

#art fight #artfight

Oh my fucking god….this person probably isn’t even aro or ace you just wanna be a savior so fucking bad! Coming from actual aroace people. You’re doing a lot with a little bit right now, anon. God thats so fucking annoying I’m so sorry artfight tumblr mods they do not speak for us.

#I guess I’m not woke lois voice #amatonormative #go fuck yourself right to hell oh my god…. #aroace #artfight #I hate people who pick non existant ass problems shut up! #I love romance but I’d never date should they stop telling romantic stories since I dont want to date? HELL NO shut up idiot #crypt.txt